Sometimes it’s hard to retrieve
The heart that’s found its way down to my sleeve
Showing itself I never know where
I hold out my hand and I find my heart there

A heart filled with sorrow
A heart filled with grief
A heart filled with pain
A heart left for another tomorrow

This heart of mine
This foolish heart
This heart that aches
This heart that breaks

It returns to me void
To start over again
I never know where
I never know when

Until that day when my heart stands still
And its silence is broken by its beats
It will continue its journey on down as it will
For as long as it takes before it finally breaks

You never expect it it just happens
It stirs up feelings you try to hide
But you can’t deny how you feel inside
It arouses your desires
You try to forget but you can’t deny her
A love that never leaves
Causing many a heart to grieve
A love you thought would never end
Left a heart that will never mend
First love never hurts a little bit
You may get out of it
But you never get over it♥

This search I search is more than I can bear
For wished dreams we used to share
I peer through the veil out into the clear
Hoping that maybe you’ll be there

I feel my search is all in vain
A quest that endures leaving  nothing but pain
I look for you around every corner
Every crowded street every quiet thorough-fare
Hoping that maybe you’ll be there

I check our favorite rendezvous
A place we shared a kiss or two
I follow the dreams we had for each other
Hoping that I might discover
Hoping that you might appear
Hoping that maybe you’ll be there

A lover’s search can never be denied
For a lover’s heart will always be tried
It seeks to find it seeks to declare
It will search any place it will search anywhere
Hoping that maybe she’ll be there♥

You never saw me cry
You never said good-bye
Not a word was said
Just heaviness in my head

You forgot to remember
(The rains) the colors of September
Our moments of splendor
The days we spent together

Not even a good-bye kiss
To remind me of its bliss
My eyes watched you leave
You never turned to see me grieve

You forgot to remember
Those summer days
That summer haze
Our true love ways

Did I do something wrong?
Is that the reason you left me?
Was I too weak? Too strong?
Am I now a forgotten memory?

You forgot to remember
Sleigh rides in December
The night our love conspired
The warmth of a winter’s fire
Our true hearts’ desires

Will I ever see you again?
Tell me where tell me when
Or if you still have thoughts of me
Or will you only be a part of my memory?

You forgot to remember
My reflection in your eyes
My string around your heart
My lips reserved set apart
Why don’t you remember?

I am the one that you loved so
I am the one that you cared about.
I am the one that you adored
I am the one that left you at your door

I never turned to see you cry
I never turned to say good-bye
I never turned to watch you go
I never turned to tell you why

I left you there all alone
I left you to wonder what went wrong
I left you to dream of what could have been
I left you with a love buried deep within

I wish you love I did not give
I wish you moments only we can relive
I wish you a life I could not impart
I wish you never again a broken heart

I am the one whose dreams are none
I am the one whose life is on pause
I am the one who orders dinner for one
I am the one who……just because

When the day is bright
One never contemplates the night
Watching the hours pass by with neither a care or a why
But when dusk comes into view
Something happens to you

When the sun begins to set
And the day is left behind
And the moon reflects its shine
And the stars appear out of the blue
Something happens to you

When the moon takes over the night
And you walk alone by the starlight
When the darkness seems eternal
And the sounds of the night are few
Something happens to you

When your thoughts caress the night
And the loneliness stares back in the dark
And your misty eyes blur your sight
And clinging to the night is all you can do
Something happens to you

When the darkness reflects its tranquility
When its peace and serenity settle in
You lie awake and let the night begin
The ticking of the clock and the beating of a lonely heart
The only sound you hear
Waiting for day to appear waiting for the night to recede
For you know in your heart there is nothing you can do
For she has happened to you

Two little words that can lead to regret
Two little words that won’t let you forget
Looking back on your life what would you do
To change the “IF ONLY” into something new?

Would you change the way you looked at love?
Would it stop you from feeling lonely?
Can you honestly say that maybe someday
You would change the “If Only”?

IF ONLY I told her I loved her
IF ONLY I told her I cared
IF ONLY I stayed as we were
Maybe she still would be here.

IF ONLY I was there when she needed me
IF ONLY I had given her my hand
IF ONLY I had opened my eyes to see
But I was too proud to understand

IF ONLY I didn’t walk away
IF ONLY I had called her on the phone
IF ONLY I had the right words to say
Maybe now I wouldn’t be so alone

Sometimes you’re given only that moment in time
To gather your thoughts and make up your mind
What you do with that moment will direct your life
So follow your heart to where it may lead
If not, you just may surrender, you just may concede
“IF ONLY”

I hated myself for the letting you go
I walked out of your life loving you so
A love too mature I couldn’t endure
Why I couldn’t look back I’ll never know
Your love was too strong and I was too weak
In love’s competition I could not compete
With commitment, compassion, jealousy, desire
All of these things that your love inspired
Please forgive me for being so weak
When it came to love I was too meek
I wish you all the things I couldn’t give
With love and happiness for as long as you live

The Lover’s Reply

Oh, you foolish lover you foolish man
How can I ever make you understand?
For my love you do not need to compete
It was you and you alone that made my heart beat
I loved your meekness, kindness, and gentle ways
I long to hold on to them the rest of my days
Yes, I forgive you and I always will
For you and you alone can make my heart stand still
I know my heart will miss you if you never look back
But take with you this memory I wrote this day
May it remain in your heart as you go your way
But if you decide it’s my love that you need
Then hurry back and we’ll make it succeed

A Lover’s Response

Never once did I doubt your love for me
It was I that doubted my love for you
A doubt that was based on my insecurity
To hold onto your love as I wanted to
It hurts me deeply to leave you behind
A decision that someday may haunt my mind
But my hurt will never compare with the hurt you feel
Your love for me so deep and real
I mustn’t look back I have to move on
Your words I will keep in my heart while I am gone
Perhaps when all my wandering ways are done
If you’ll have me back then we shall be one
***************************************
“I love you the more in that I believe
You had liked me for my own sake
And for nothing else”
John Keats
(1795-1821)

How does one put on paper how he feels inside?
Something changed in me something I could not hide
Something changed in me I’ll never be the same
I never thought at all that love was the game

I had no idea what love was all about
I never thought that word would ever leave my mouth
No one really knows what love could do
I never-ever felt my heart until she came into view

I tried to deny the feelings I felt
But something about her made my heart melt
No words were ever spoken no need just a look
Those eyes, that smile, were all that it took

Something changed in me I’ll never be the same
I fell in love without even knowing her name
Nothing would be the same, the same as they were
For now I’ll spend the rest of my life loving her

I wish it would go away
This feeling that begs to stay
These thoughts of mine tear at the heart
Haunting me from day to day
No one knows what’s happening inside
This feeling I carefully hide
A secret between me and my thoughts
One that I’ve unsuccessfully fought
A struggle to keep the heart forgetting
Has left only thoughts of a heart regretting
I wish it would go away
This feeling that begs to stay
And let me love again while I may♥
***************
“Love is so short
Forgetting is so long”
Pablo Neruda