Oh how I’ll hate the longing years
The years counted by drops of my tears
The years ahead that I’ll spend
The years of my life where I’ll pretend
That life has meaning and purpose for me
A life I’ll keep secret that no one will see
The time in my life where I’ll make-believe
Many I’ll fool
Many I’ll deceive
For no one knows what’s locked in my heart
The love I’ve stored
The love I’ve kept
The tears I’ve tasted
The tears I’ve wept
A life I’ll keep silent never to conceal
For no one listens
For no one hears
Oh how I’ll hate the longing years
************************************
“What worries you,
Masters you.”
John Locke
(1632-1704)

Haunted by a delusive spirit
You become enslaved to false beliefs and opinions
You chase after untruths that tickle your ears
You distort reality contrary to fact
You discover yourself misled by your doubts and fears

No where to turn you continue the path
Along with others
Dismissing the aftermath
Never a cry for help heard
Never a word

You find yourself disillusioned
Fooled
Tricked
Duped
Into thinking everything is cool

You conceive wrongly
Being deceived all along
But for you
Wrongs are always right
Rights are always wrong
***********************
“Facts do not cease to exist
Because they are ignore”
Aldous Hurley, Complete essays 2

You pretend to be what you are not
You feign reality
Continually
Cease-less

You role play life
That you invent
Fabricate
Imitate
Simulate

You wear a pretentious front
You attempt to deceive
A false showing
With false reasoning
While in your heart you believe

You play a make-believe lying game
With never a hint of shame
That we also play along
So why should we assign any blame
When we ourselves pretend there’s nothing wrong
**********************************************
“God has given you one face,
And you make yourself another.”

William Shakespeare

Why pray to an imposter
Why hold up futility
Why claim misplaced loyalty
Why follow false reasoning
You speak lies your heart has conceived
You utter lies your heart has believed

You owe allegiance to
Things that are
Worthless
Impotent
Powerless

You kiss a piece of wood
You caress things you’ve obsessed for
You chase after flattering lips
With misdirected devotion

You’ll never know how fragile life can be
When you live out each day  in vanity
They may go by many titles
But soon they become your secret idols

Do you morn for yourself?
Do you feel any joy in unrelenting pain?
Do you witness any gain?
Are you willing to see tomorrow
If it’s worth the pain today?

Pangs may seize you
Pain may grip you
Painkillers haunt you
Painless
Endless
Relentless
Whom do you turn to?

Life has no guarantees
No one is immune
Some tolerate others can’t
Some can rise above
Others descend below

Soon you come to realize
That life has no compromise
Only a choice
You can’t have both
But are you willing to surrender your pain
Into the hands of
Someone who is willing to break an oat?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Pain is the breaking of the shell that
encloses your understanding.”
Kahlil Gibran

With whom am I in enmity with?
With whom do I wish to sit?
Only those that share my beliefs?
Who never call me a hypocrite?

Who is my enemy?
Those whose bitterness leads to hostility
Those that conceal their animosity
Those with latent prejudices
Those that display antagonism
Those that harbor rage
Those who exercise pride

I have made my choice
I’ve made clear my voice
I know with whom I sit
My place is at the gate
Never to be called a hypocrite

Less you take care
Less you take heed
You must also choose
His seed or hers

Some say dreams are only made of wishes
A longing for
A heart’s desire
But dreams are like clouds passing through
You find yourself reaching
But nothing to hold on to
They quickly pass leaving one to wonder
If they ever will stop to have them come true

Some dreams are full of sorrows
Some dreams are filled with joy
Some dreams we sometimes borrow
Some dreams we sometimes ignore

There are dreams that make your heart stand still
There are dreams that tease you just for a thrill
There are dreams that will never be told
There are dreams you wish you could always hold
There are dreams that never can be
There are dreams that only your eyes will see

They say that one can never touch a dream
But a dream can touch a heart
So follow your dreams
Your heart’s desires
If not, unfulfilled dreams may tear you apart
**************************************
“Dreams are the today’s answers to tomorrow’ s questions”
Edger Cayce

Sunrise, sunset
One day blends into another
It’s hard to tell them apart
When one doesn’t know where to start
You step aside and watch time pass by
Never stopping
Never a why

Time moves on
Leaving you to ponder
Upon what might have been
If you tried

But choices are choices
Never to be taken back
Regrets are regrets
Won’t let you forget
Mistakes are mistakes
Never to forsake
Choices, regrets, mistakes
Are what memories make

No one can stop the movement of time
Only memories make time stand still
For no one can turn back time
No one has the power to
So let it lead you on as it will

  A book of recollections
A book to reminisce
A book to remember
A book some never will miss

Pictures appear
Like ghosts from the past
Photos of faces
Frozen in time
Forgotten memories
Painfully exposed
Written epitaphs
Buried In pages
Full of graffiti
Scribbled on bathroom walls

Solemn reminders
Of youth
And those that shared
Insecurities
For things learned
That never really mattered

Haunting
Hallowed halls
Shadowy recalls
Of undefined moments

Pages that whisper
Return again
To a season in time
Remember when

Roses were red
Violets were blue
Sugar was sweet
And so were you

.

Youthful play
Youthful thoughts
Lead to a longing for an asking for
Things that our imaginations sought
When we were told long ago
That wishing would make it so

So we wished for love
So we wished for happiness
So we wished for health
So we wished for wealth

But wishes only happen when we believe
Wishes only happen when we’re certain in our heart
Wishes only happen when we concede
A wish is never make-believe

So if you believe as many do
That wishes you make always come true
For no one should never-ever forsake
Wishes we will always make
For wishes are only the dreams we have
When we are awake